The Line King: When in doubt, pick old-school coaches - KAIT Jonesboro, AR - Region 8 News, weather, sports

The Line King: When in doubt, pick teams with old-school coaches

  • AlabamaMore>>

  • Alabama finalizes 2018 football schedule

    Alabama finalizes 2018 football schedule

    Tuesday, September 19 2017 4:49 PM EDT2017-09-19 20:49:44 GMT
    Source: WBRCSource: WBRC

    Officials at the University of Alabama finalized the 2018 football schedule on Tuesday. As usual, there are seven home games scheduled for Bryant-Denny Stadium with one neutral site game and four SEC road games.

    Officials at the University of Alabama finalized the 2018 football schedule on Tuesday. As usual, there are seven home games scheduled for Bryant-Denny Stadium with one neutral site game and four SEC road games.

  • Bama prepares for an unbeaten Vandy

    Bama prepares for an unbeaten Vandy

    Monday, September 18 2017 5:30 PM EDT2017-09-18 21:30:30 GMT
    Source: WBRCSource: WBRC

    It's a surprising match-up Saturday in Nashville with a battle of unbeaten teams between Alabama and Vanderbilt.

    It's a surprising match-up Saturday in Nashville with a battle of unbeaten teams between Alabama and Vanderbilt.

  • Sports

    No. 1 Alabama overpowers Colorado State

    No. 1 Alabama overpowers Colorado State

    Saturday, September 16 2017 10:17 PM EDT2017-09-17 02:17:56 GMT

    The Crimson Tide made the most of their final non-conference game before starting their SEC schedule.

    The Crimson Tide made the most of their final non-conference game before starting their SEC schedule.

  • LSUMore>>

  • LSU football enjoys team outing at original T.J. Ribs restaurant

    LSU football enjoys team outing at original T.J. Ribs restaurant

    Tuesday, August 11 2015 9:37 PM EDT2015-08-12 01:37:12 GMT
    Tuesday, August 11 2015 10:06 PM EDT2015-08-12 02:06:19 GMT
    The LSU football team took a break from the sweaty grind of fall camp Tuesday night to enjoy some team bonding and great food.
    The LSU football team took a break from the sweaty grind of fall camp Tuesday night to enjoy some team bonding and great food.
  • LSU football wants return to 2011 defense

    LSU football wants return to 2011 defense

    Thursday, August 6 2015 3:15 PM EDT2015-08-06 19:15:51 GMT
    Thursday, August 6 2015 3:36 PM EDT2015-08-06 19:36:51 GMT
    LSU may have ranked No. 1 in the SEC defensively last season, but many fans and analysts agree that wasn’t an accurate reflection of how the team actually played. 
    LSU may have ranked No. 1 in the SEC defensively last season, but many fans and analysts agree that wasn’t an accurate reflection of how the team actually played. 
  • LSU football reports for fall camp, Miles says Bain was never reinstated

    LSU football reports for fall camp, Miles says Bain was never reinstated

    Wednesday, August 5 2015 12:06 PM EDT2015-08-05 16:06:42 GMT
    Wednesday, August 5 2015 4:52 PM EDT2015-08-05 20:52:04 GMT
    On a steamy and sweltering morning in south Louisiana, the LSU football team officially reported for the start of fall camp. The Tigers checking into the West Campus Apartments Wednesday morning, with their first practice set for Thursday. 
    On a steamy and sweltering morning in south Louisiana, the LSU football team officially reported for the start of fall camp. The Tigers checking into the West Campus Apartments Wednesday morning, with their first practice set for Thursday. 
  • Texas A&MMore>>

  • Week 2 Preview: Playoff implications & Heisman bounce back

    Week 2 Preview: Playoff implications & Heisman bounce back

    Friday, September 8 2017 3:26 AM EDT2017-09-08 07:26:41 GMT
    Friday, September 8 2017 11:39 AM EDT2017-09-08 15:39:07 GMT
    Hurricane Irma has shut down the top teams from the Sunshine State, but college football will be played around much of the country Saturday.
    Hurricane Irma has shut down the top teams from the Sunshine State, but college football will be played around much of the country Saturday.

The following column is satire and intended for entertainment purposes.

College football coaches don't use the words "chicken" and "coward" so much in the brave, new politically correct world of college athletics, and saying that those in power wear "panties" usually results in a few weeks of sensitivity training.

So it was really nostalgic to hear Larry Blakeney, the Troy (AL) Trojans head coach of 23 years, sound off and tell Savannah Now exactly what he thought about Auburn and Alabama refusing to play his team, which travels to Mississippi State on Saturday.

Blakeney is among the last of the old-school college football coaches. He still says things like "We need to just keep choppin' wood," "we'll have to sit down under a tree and figure it out," "we've got to go out there and punch them in the mouth," and "you're darn tootin'."

He oversells the opposition and downplays his team's success better than Lou Holtz. He talks less about recruiting and more about raising "his" young men. His on-field, fully armed entourage includes an Alabama State Trooper and members of the Troy PD and Troy University PD. It's been that way ever since he walked on campus back when Troy was playing West Georgia and Valdosta State instead of LSU and Georgia.

Blakeney reluctantly started wearing headsets about five years ago – his coach and mentor Shug Jordan didn't, so why should he?

He comes from a world where honor, tradition and loyalty mean something and where a reporter is told he "can print that" – like anyone still reads a real newspaper these days.

Well, maybe Larry does.

Week Two: 5-5

Season: 17-14

Sept. 21

North Texas @ Georgia -36½: SunBelt castoff UNT is 1-1 against the MAC this season. The Line King doesn't like their chances in the $EC this week. Dawgs take them behind the hedges for an old school, Vince Dooley-style whupping.

Vanderbilt @ Massachusetts +36: When was Vandy ever a 36-point favorite on the road? For the second week in a row, The Line King can't sit with his friend the Vandy fan, plus the UMass coach looks and dresses like Pat Riley, and nobody outdressed Pat Riley.

Tennessee -15½ @ Florida: Perfect contrarian play. All of the $EC homers think Florida is like Oregon without those crazy uniforms. Ha! Oregon is the antithesis of old school.

Rice +4 @ Houston: The Line King's mother saw Bammer's Tommy Lewis tackle the Owls' Dicky Moegle in the 1954 Cotton Bowl. Unfortunately, Lewis was sitting on the bench while Moegle ran by on his way to a 95-yard TD. Ooops!

Moegle ended up with 265 yards that game. My grandfather wore a suit to the game, smoked a pack of cigarettes in the stands and Rice stomped Bammer, too. Houston isn't Bammer, Rice doesn't have Moegle and heaven help you if you light up in the parking lot. Although Rice is back to being pretty competitive these days.

Troy +13.5 @ Mississippi State: Ole Mississippi State is barely 2-1 against Troy, including using turnovers to win in dominating fashion, 11-8 in 2003, and using a fourth-down 25-yard TD to "pull away" to a 30-24 win in Troy last year.

Old school coaches always trump whiteout games. They need to ban whiteout/blackout games altogether. How about encouraging fans to wear a suit and tie to the game? Maybe allow them to smoke in the stands.

Colorado State +36.5 @ Alabama: This is CFB's version of soccer's international "friendly." One would think that $aban has an ounce of loyalty in him and doesn't run up the score on his former offensive coordinator. This is the first meeting between the two schools. Well, duh!

SMU @ Texas A&M -26.5: Peruna is getting a lot of help this weekend, but The Line King isn't sold on June Jones. Bring back Forest Gregg! Bring back the SWC! Johnny Football needs a bounce-back game, and he gets it here.

Auburn @ LSU -14: Contrarian thinking here would say take Barn, but LSUAMC didn't cover last week (as predicted), so The Line King is going anti-contrarian and saying the Tigers (the purple ones) come out swinging. Oh, remember when this matchup meant something, and Mike Archer was the coach at LSUAMC?

Missouri -5½ @ Indiana: This would have been a good rivalry in the Big Ten. It might take three decades before people actually remember Mizzou is part of the $EC. By then there will only be four 30-team conferences and a bowl game in Montgomery, AL. Wait, that's another story for another day.

Western Michigan @ Iowa -19: The Line King's dad's high school idol was a senior named Hayden Frye. Now that's old school. He doesn't coach anymore, but no way does Western Michigan cover two straight weeks against the Big Ten. They lost to Nicholls State, for goodness sake!

Copyright 2013 Raycom News Network. All rights reserved.

  • SEC FootballSEC CoverageMore>>

  • Missed Inside the 10 this week? Rick Sanford, USC beat writer David Cloninger talk USC moving forward after UK loss

    Missed Inside the 10 this week? Rick Sanford, USC beat writer David Cloninger talk USC moving forward after UK loss

    Wednesday, September 20 2017 10:30 PM EDT2017-09-21 02:30:54 GMT

    WIS is launching a new sports talk show on Facebook Live! Every Wednesday at 7:30 p.m., Rick Henry, Emery Glover and their special guests will get together at 1801 Grille in downtown Columbia for thirty minutes of spirited college football talk on Facebook Live. 

    WIS is launching a new sports talk show on Facebook Live! Every Wednesday at 7:30 p.m., Rick Henry, Emery Glover and their special guests will get together at 1801 Grille in downtown Columbia for thirty minutes of spirited college football talk on Facebook Live. 

  • Mississippi State trio earns SEC weekly honors

    Mississippi State trio earns SEC weekly honors

    Monday, September 18 2017 12:25 PM EDT2017-09-18 16:25:48 GMT
    WLBTWLBT

    Junior quarterback Nick Fitzgerald earned Offensive Player of the Week, sophomore Darryl Williams picked up Offensive Lineman of the Week and sophomore Jeffery Simmons was named Defensive Lineman of the Week after leading MSU to a 37-30 victory over #11 LSU.

    Junior quarterback Nick Fitzgerald earned Offensive Player of the Week, sophomore Darryl Williams picked up Offensive Lineman of the Week and sophomore Jeffery Simmons was named Defensive Lineman of the Week after leading MSU to a 37-30 victory over #11 LSU.

  • Fitzgerald has 4 TDs as MSU routs #11 LSU 37-7

    Fitzgerald has 4 TDs as MSU routs #11 LSU 37-7

    Sunday, September 17 2017 12:10 PM EDT2017-09-17 16:10:29 GMT

    Mississippi State beats LSU 37-7.  Click on the video above for highlights.  Copyright 2017 MSNewsNow. All rights reserved.

    Mississippi State beats LSU 37-7.  Click on the video above for highlights.  Copyright 2017 MSNewsNow. All rights reserved.

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